Overview and Sampling of KindEdge Concepts

As you leap into this Project of You, you will soon discover the importance of fortifying the foundation. Despite your best intentions, if you don’t evaluate the foundational elements, you are at risk of getting tripped up by the parts of your life that no longer fit with your new goal.

What will ensure this big life change works for you in real life? What are the mindset shifts that smooth out the path ahead? What actionable tools and hacks can you leverage to turn a fuzzy intention into a real and doable thing?

Here we dig into the many core concepts that help you build a foundation for change. From mindsets, to daily practices, to easy hacks, these are all important tools in your toolbox for change. 

A Foundation for Change

Achieving one big goal in your life requires that you start to think—and respond—differently to everything, from how you address planning and commitments, to how you prioritize health, to how you test and think about relationships and boundaries. While you march toward one big goal, you’ll also become an expert on exactly what behaviors and mindsets you need to guard your time and mindshare and ensure they are well-preserved fuel for the Project of You. 

‍Core Concepts

I created KindEdge over many years. I continually refined my approach by scanning and testing many tools and methods, and then I objectively reflected on what worked, and what did not. Many best-laid plans or aspirational goals don’t turn out to be the best fit for our personal rhythms, or our outside commitments, or our preferences for either more or less structure. In KindEdge, we simply run tests, and without judgment, we keep what works, and discard the rest. 

Run tests. 

Ask “what worked?” 

Keep that. 

And run more tests. 

‍Do what works. In real life. 

‍See how simple it can be? 

The hyper-complex, hyper-preachy, hyper-tribal, or hyper-ra-ra advice out there failed my “real life” tests. In KindEdge, you are welcome to try a diet and then walk away when it just doesn’t work for your daily rhythms, your brain structure or your personality. If anything’s gonna stick, it’s gotta be right for you and only you. You’ve gotta be perma-chuffed and genuinely jazzed to do anything big or hard. You don’t need to try harder to be a better dieter in a diet that just objectively doesn’t work for your social life, bedtimes or gustatory preferences. Just take note of what didn’t work, toss it out, and try a modified or new approach until something sticks. And only you can judge what works in your life. 

If you want to become a marathoner but your 4:00am run club’s schedule leaves you exhausted and brain-dead by 3:00pm, build up a muscle for change by negotiating a longer lunch break at work that enables you a few long runs each week while still getting in your precious morning sleep hours. And yes, you will then also need to work on the KindEdge concept of making tough choices because, as your daily schedules change, something in your evenings might need to be de-prioritized. 

‍See how all these concepts are connected and vital parts of establishing a foundation for change? 

And it gets more critical when we start to talk about bigger life changes that impact careers, relationships, and community affiliations. Changes that will have broad-reaching impacts to the people and communities in your life require you to have an incredibly strong muscle for change. You’ve got to be quite physically fit, mentally fit, soulfully fit, and systematically fit to handle all the touch choices and conversations that lie ahead. 

How I Identified these Core Anchors

I documented these concepts based on what might be explained by the Markov chain and law of large numbers. I simply worked on each micro challenge and kept notes. But over time I saw macro consistencies that seemed to be common threads in business, interpersonal, and private problem solving. Eventually, I could see banana peels everywhere I looked and I was able to call out exactly who would get tripped up on what. If we don’t master these core concepts, we will trip ourselves up on invisible banana peels. 

But by exposing and admitting various uncomfortable truths, we make these invisible banana peels visible. And once that banana peel is visible, we can deal with it before we fall. Decoding and disarming those invisible banana peels can be deep and complex work. But it can also be as simple as knowing your best bud is likely to pressure you into staying out late drinking the night before an important morning marathon practice. So you might start by setting a simple alarm on your phone and tell a little white lie that you must leave. And then you might invest time with a therapist to help you grow stronger skills for saying “No, my running goals are more important to me than drinking with you tonight. But thanks and wish me well on my morning run!” 

The more you expose all the invisible banana peels in your patterns, the more you can be sure you’ll have a smooth path forward toward your one big goal. 

So you can dig into all these types of tools and hacks and concepts in the KindEdge blogs and videos. Here is a sampling of concepts. 

• Experimentos - A process of experimenting with daily schedules, practices, and routines to optimize how your body and brain’s energy cycles are matched with how you organize the minutes in your day. It includes a continual practice of inviting in new experiments simply to test what works in real life. 
• Metrics - Emotion, guilt, expectations, and judgment are terrible teachers. Don’t waste time trying harder at something that doesn’t work. Don’t self flog or self blame. Expect outcomes or move on, without emotion or judgment. When we use metrics we have the power of data rather than the drag of guilt. For example, I tracked my daily habits and identified patterns around the days that felt bad or unproductive or wherein I ate unhealthy foods that I did not intend to. Instead of blaming myself for imperfection, I simply looked at my objective metrics and realized that my awesome in-flow wise minded days were those wherein–the night before–I’d placed a 32oz bottle of water next to my bed. Really? Is it that simple? Yes! It is. My metrics tracking helped me decode that having a dedicated water bottle next to my bed for wake-up time was the magical hack to ensure I’d have a great day. Some revelations are so simple it’s almost stupid. But if it works, it’s a keeper!
• Gu-r-YOU - Ok, sure. Doesn’t roll trippingly off the tongue, but we start to see that it’s great to taste-test advice from the myriad gurus out there, but is more important to trust, and follow the guru that is gu-r-YOU. No amount of ra-ra enthusiasm or expert advice can match the value of you running tests on what works for you. 
• Humans need totems to bring the words and intentions of our wise minds into our daily lives where our minds are more muddled
• Black box it
• Contract to expands
• Crawl, walk run
• Dance with the frog
• Digging in a new groove
• Cutting strings
• Duty addiction
• Expect it
• Infinite self-kaizen
• Kind Reframe
• Sacred trades
• Magic in the Mess
• Slow is Flow
• And more…

Dig in to the KindEdge blogs, videos and steps to build the foundation that will support your path forward toward the changes you seek. 

Thanks for joining me on this journey. 

Cheers, cin-cin and hugs 

@ MarySueIRL

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